Funny Quotes from Facebook

Funny Facebook QuotesWhat are some of the funny things you read on Facebook? Some days I have tears running down my face because I am laughing so hard at the status updates I read.  I thought it would be fun to share some of the things I read and cheer up someone else’s day.  OK, the names have been withheld to protect the innocent, but nonetheless these are hilarious.

I hope you enjoy them as much as I did:

Sooo my handy man was watching the Alabama vs. LSU on Saturday. I watched with him for a bit. Alabama had the ball….. 4 of the yellow guys (LSU) held hands and headed down the field. I didn’t know they did that in football. How sweet!

We come into this world GUILT-free. SUGAR-free. CAFFEINE-free. I’d like to start over..

advice: Do NOT google “boy fairies” there are some real weirdos out there. Just still trying to figure out my sons Tooth Fairy costume. He wants tights and wings but no skirt or shorts…..

think my second favorite household chore is the laundry, that is, if the first is hitting my head against the wall until I faint.

My husband really gave me a hard time for asking him to “whip me up a caucasian to help me feel better” caucasian, concoction.. whatever!!

pet peeve: husband channel surfing, stops on a movie we own but watches it mid way and with all the commercials.

We had some antelope for dinner last night. That’s a first for me. Loved it!

kids and them not liking what you make for dinner. Definitely makes for an interesting night. One bite and that was it, but tears, tantrum and screams because of a tostada. Reply: Tell your husband if he’s going to pitch a fit then he’ll just have to go to bed hungry.

I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they get closer. Then it hit me.

So today I looked around, most the boys were kissing their girlfriends at the door of class and the rest I noticed had on wedding rings, did all this happen over the weekend?

HOLY @$&%! I have a black cat living in my house at night. IT just scared the crap out me! later update: lol no it’s the neighbors cat! …apparently she likes my Doggy door!

showing up to work on time is like showing up to a party right as it starts: LAME. – Showing up 15 minutes late lets others know you have a life AND lets you make a great entrance all at the same time….Lets hope my new boss agrees

just challenged our 6-year-old to eat ice cream with ketchup for a Hot Wheels car. He scarfed it down.

sittin in a tree stand :] posted: via Mobile Web

There were too many funny status updates. I could have gone on and on. This should cheer you up for today though. Are there any funny posts that you have read? Please share them with me in comments.


Funny Quotes from Facebook — 5 Comments

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